From the womb - Los Angeles Post-ExaminerLos Angeles Post-Examiner

From the womb

I’m sitting in a room with my friend Nova, watching her sleep. It’s obvious that she is on a journey to her next experience. When will her transition happen? Tonight? Tomorrow? Next week? Does she know when she is leaving? Does she know what is waiting for her? All of these questions run through my mind.

 As I look at Nova, I realize that I’m on a journey also. This evening I decide to meditate. I do that often, but lately it has been more difficult for me to center myself. Tonight I was able to just sit and allow the Universe to speak to me. So what did I hear? I heard or felt the Universe express how wonderful it would be to start again. Follow the yellow brick road; go back to where I began my journey; go back to the womb.

 It is my last week of working as a live-in caregiver to this great lady. Without the extra income I must move back into a small mobile home with my son.

Backwards – backwards – backwards!!! It’s the story of my life. Why is it the story of my life? What has led me to this? Why is this happening to me? I keep asking this question and I get more and more depressed. Sitting silently, the memory of a seminar I attended in February of 2011 comes back to me. The lady said to ask a different question. Ask God, “Why is this happening FOR me?” 

 Perception! It’s all about perception. My son has felt dependent on me and he seemed ashamed of it. It was a perception I promoted; if not out loud, then in my mind. It was my opinion. 

Perception! I decided to talk to him about my renting a room from him in his home – just until his lease is up. He agreed. The tables have turned. It looks the same on the outside but it feels very different on the inside.

That workshop and the revisited question led me to meditate and perceive my situation differently.  Tonight I see it as a wonderful opportunity to start over… To try this thing called life again… Go back to the beginning… the yellow brick road… To create that warm, serene, comfortable place I started out in… The Womb

••• •••• ••••• •••• •••• 

I wrote the above piece on August 7, 2011.

Over the next nine months, I continued to do occasional care giving and was able to help close out Nova’s house after she passed away. In May of 2012, under the new arrangements, I moved into the small mobile home with my son. At Thanksgiving of that year he was given the opportunity to move into a larger mobile home at a price equal to his rent and the cost of my two storage units. He acquired it with the idea of renting me a room and storage space for my stuff.  This was working out just great and we both felt good about it.

Just before we moved I noticed that I hadn’t felt very good. I thought I might have a cold or the flu because I couldn’t eat and was exhausted all the time. I didn’t realize that what I thought was the flu was actually a life threatening drug interaction which landed me in the intensive care unit of Tampa General Hospital. When I awoke from my coma on January 3, 2013, I was confused and afraid. I didn’t know where I was or what was happening to me. I was terrified, to say the least. There were tubes all around me and a red light on the tip of my finger. I thought I was in a space ship with ET.

For four months I was to remain in the hospital, completely dependent on others: the nurses, the doctors, and especially my son. He had to take care of every aspect of my life, including squeezing the toothpaste tube for me. I simply had no muscle strength. My son even spoke of learning to bathe me and change my diapers, which was very difficult for me to hear. It was like I had just been born and he was my parent. I actually felt very safe with him and much loved by him.

As I lay there, physically helpless, it was becoming clearer every day why this illness happened FOR me. It seems that my life was starting all over. From the beginning … From the womb.

 


About the author

Cheryl Gleghorn

Cheryl Gleghorn grew up in Milwaukee, WI where she attended St. Gregory the Great Catholic Church. The second of eight children, she started learning early on the power of love and compassion. Spirituality was her calling. Because of her affiliation with a marketing group while in her early twenties, she was introduced to the world of self-help and positive thinking … which led to the notion that there was probably a connection to God somewhere in all of that. In 1996, Cheryl found Science of Mind; A faith, a philosophy, and a way of life. This is the connection to God she was looking for. This movement was started by Dr Ernest Holmes in the early part of the twentieth century... In 2002, after several years of study, she became a licensed practitioner under the umbrella of United Church of Religious Science (later- Centers for Spiritual Living). Today she attends the Center for Spiritual Living in Bradenton, FL. Cheryl teaches this philosophy, does spiritual coaching, gives prayer support, leads meditation and facilitates visioning groups. Contact the author.
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