She was never a slut
Listen to this article“People hasten to judge in order not to be judged themselves.”
― Albert Camus, The Fall
The year was 1968. At 23 years old I was pretty obsessed with myself and noticed that most of the world was beneath me. I was, after all, a nursing student who was training to be an LPN. I can remember sitting around with the other students and enjoying the gossip and discussions of everyone’s failures and faults. There was never a lack of material for the gabfest and it was enhanced by the number of patients we had to take care of who we thought were real losers.
“When you judge others, you do not define them, you define yourself.”
― Earl Nightingale
During our rotation in the obstetrics unit, we were introduced to a baby girl who was born with syphilis. That meant that the mother had syphilis and passed it on to the child. It was so sad to think that this baby was going to have this dirty disease for the rest of her life. And the mom must be a slut because only sluts had those diseases. I couldn’t get her out of my mind. I really hated the mom, and as far as I was concerned she could rot in prison. I kept my opinion to myself, but boy did I ever think that baby should be taken from her. She was scum, plain and simple.
“Don’t judge based on what you see, judge based on what you know, because the two are rarely similar.”
― Markus Peterson
One of our student assignments was to observe a new mother learning to give her baby a bath. The new mother I was observing happened to be, of course, the horrible person who gave her baby a disease. I expected to see one kind of person and found myself looking, instead, at a very stunning young woman. She had the most beautiful skin and hair. One could tell that she took very meticulous care of herself, her hygiene, and her appearance. She reminded me of Sophia Loren and I couldn’t get over it. Her eyes were magnificent and when she looked at her new daughter you could see the love, pride, and excitement radiating from her. Again, I couldn’t stop looking at her, and what I observed was simply amazing. Something must have come into her life to help her change her ways. I decided to like her because I realized that people could change after all.
“Be kind to people and don’t judge, for you do not know what demons they carry and what battles they are fighting.”
― Vashti Quiroz-Vega
The last day of the rotation we sat down and read the case study on a patient. Sure enough, we were going to study this lady’s history. I could hardly wait to hear this filthy story, so I opened the file … World War II was in full swing; devastating towns and villages all over Italy. This lady was living in a small village with her parents and brother when troops came through with a vengeance. Apparently they took her parents outside of the house, killed them, and came back in. She was raped by a soldier while she watched them kill her brother. That soldier left her with a permanent reminder of this malicious time; he infected her with syphilis. She was only 12 years old. She was just a little girl.
“How easy it is to judge rightly after one sees what evil comes from judging wrongly.”
― Elizabeth Gaskell, Wives and Daughters
I couldn’t breathe after I read that. Something hit me hard right in the stomach. Had I been standing, I would have fallen as my legs gave out. I was overwhelmed with a feeling of horror at how I had judged her. I remember thinking about the fact that I never said aloud my thoughts about her. For whatever reason I didn’t, and I was grateful for that. For days and even weeks I was overcome with emotion. How could I have been so nasty and judgmental? That lady didn’t deserve what I was thinking. I hated myself. I was the repulsive one, not her. I didn’t know if I would ever get over that feeling.
There is a reason I still remember this story so vividly. I prayed to God to bring this incident to my mind if I ever again judged another human being. Over the years, God has kept that promise.
“Judge not, that ye be not judged.”
Matthew 7:1-3 King James Version
Cheryl Gleghorn grew up in Milwaukee, WI where she attended St. Gregory the Great Catholic Church. The second of eight children, she started learning early on the power of love and compassion. Spirituality was her calling. Because of her affiliation with a marketing group while in her early twenties, she was introduced to the world of self-help and positive thinking … which led to the notion that there was probably a connection to God somewhere in all of that.
In 1996, Cheryl found Science of Mind; A faith, a philosophy, and a way of life. This is the connection to God she was looking for. This movement was started by Dr Ernest Holmes in the early part of the twentieth century… In 2002, after several years of study, she became a licensed practitioner under the umbrella of United Church of Religious Science (later- Centers for Spiritual Living).
Today she attends the Center for Spiritual Living in Bradenton, FL.
Cheryl teaches this philosophy, does spiritual coaching, gives prayer support, leads meditation and facilitates visioning groups.