Relationships: Let a man be a man

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Recently I have had several conversations with female friends on how they feel that men are threatened by their successes and their independence. My friends feel that their successes and independence are keeping them from either meeting guys that they really want a future with or keeping guys that they feel they hit it off with. However, as conversations go on and I learn more I hear a recurring theme: they aren’t letting men be men.

Often, prior to landing the person of your dreams, you probably were taking care of yourself or yourself and a child and you felt that you had everything under control, that you have a plan and that things have worked for you thus far. Now enters this great person and you’re trying to figure out how to make that work, as well. Here’s the thing: men are men and women are women. It might seem like a minor detail, but it carries a lot of weight.

Men, especially, need to feel that they are being the man in the relationship or “the one that wears the pants” so when a strong, independent woman emasculates them — they usually decide to move on. Men need to feel that they are able to contribute, able to take care of and able to be the man you fell in love with.

If you’re constantly fixing your own car problems, pumping your own gas, taking out your own trash — he’s going to start to feel that you don’t need him and he will find someone else that does.

It may be hard to let a man take care of you if you’ve been taking care of you for quite some time, but let the tides turn. Let your man do the things a man should and restore the equilibrium that may be shifting in your relationship; you’ll be glad you did. Cheers!